Trust and Patience

Let me know if I'm wrong here, but I think I'm sensing a pattern. 

On April 1st, 2010 I got a letter back from the Island School that they didn't have a spot for me, but that I had been wait-listed. "Sit tight," they said. "A spot might open up for you." I honestly can't remember my reaction, but  I can only assume that it was bad. Rejection hadn't shown itself in my life until this point, and for the first one, this one was rough. On Memorial Day Weekend of that year, I got a call from the Island School that a position had just opened, and that I had to let them know of my decision in 24 hours. Clearly, I made the decision and ended up hauling myself and 100 pounds of gear down to the Island of Eleuthera. 

On April 1st, 2012 while on my spring break in Mexico, I found out via Facetiming my grandma that I had not been accepted to the University of Southern California. They don't offer a wait list, this one was a clear rejection: we simply don't have room to accept you. When I got home and actually got to look at my rejection letter with my own eyes, there was a second piece of paper behind the official decision entitled, "How to appeal your admission decision." The process wasn't long, just to write a one-page letter explaining why I thought I deserved to be at USC. The chances of actually changing their mind was slim, but I tried anyway. I found out on May 5, 2012 that they did, in fact, change their mind. I got accepted for the spring semester of the next year, just not the fall so I could take the place of potential transfers, graduating students, etc.

I'm incredibly good at being on a wait list or getting something that wasn't supposed to happen originally. 

Yesterday, at 10:30 a.m. I opened an email that said there was not a position for me to be an RA next year, but that they would be keeping my file open as an alternate. 

In no way, shape or form am I holding onto certainty, belief or pretense that I will granted a position. My point I'm trying to make is not bragging about my accomplishments. It's not saying that I will always get what I want. My message is that there is incredible power that comes from the humility of rejection and honoring and praising God even in (or especially because of) that rejection. 

The night before I found out about my RA decision, I was reading from Jesus Calling, a daily quick devotional and this is what Sarah Young wrote:

"If you mouth the words 'I trust you' while anxiously trying to make things go your way, your words ring hollow." 

I am not waiting for Residence Life to call me and tell me they have an open position. I am simply listening and waiting, reflecting and praying on the next opportunity God will present to me. I am not waiting expectantly for what I want to happen, but for His will to be done through me. 

Mutual Weirdness

“We are all a little weird and life’s a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.”

A note on weirdness: I love it. I am the weirdest person that I know.

I love cats. 

Star Wars is my favorite saga. 

When the newest Star Trek movie came out, I watched it almost every day for 2 weeks.

The new Avengers movie...I can't even.

I am a total nerd - I love school.

I love anything that is awkward.

Other than a turtle or a cat, my favorite animal is a mudskipper. Shout out to AP Bio 2012. 

I don't like Nutella - which I'm finding out is a staple in nutrition and is probably a large cause for concern for freshmen. 

I think you get it, I'm super weird. But, I like who I am and I boast in that. Without my little quirks and little pieces of weirdness, I wouldn't be who God intended me to be. 

And now, I'm so blessed to have a hall that (mostly) emulates these values like I do - maybe not to the same extent. My hall is all so different, but our differences are what allow us to get along and to have a fun, silly time together and to live well together. Because of this melding of weirdness, we have adopted this quote as our own for the hall. 

So this post is a shout out to one of my favorite people I've been blessed to get to know and one of the first people I met at Azusa - Meika Folkerts, my RA. She has facilitated this attitude and this mutual weirdness on my hall and is just so dandy and I am so thankful to have her.  

Love you Meiks! 

A Long Time Coming

Well...we (me and my multiple personalities) made some big decisions in the last couple of weeks. If you are my mom, my roommates, my RA, or in the LAC, you basically know how much I've been contemplating and deciding this thing that's been whirling around in my head. So, now that I've made a pseudo-concrete decision, I'll let you all in on it as well.

First some background: I love journalism, have loved journalism, and probably will love journalism for the rest of my life. I like hearing/reading about/watching news. I've said I wanted to be a journalist since I was four, says my mother. And, since I'm pretty stubborn, it stuck because no one (including myself sometimes) can change my mind.

So I spent my growing up years in high school focused on that goal. I started working on the paper freshman year and worked my way up to Editor-In-Chief by junior year, and continued that position senior year. I also joined the broadcast lab junior year and loved being on set as an anchor as well.

This last February, I also had an incredibly special opportunity to go the the Detroit Red Wings High School Journalist Day where I got to be a part of a press conference interviewing the CEO of the Red Wings, the head coach, 3 players, the media, and the public relations specialists that work for the Red Wings. While I was there, I really felt that I was supposed to work in media, in updating people with information and events, and I loved writing and asking questions. So for me, that was the day that solidified, "Yes, this is really what I'm supposed to be doing."

...And then I came to Azusa. And I suddenly felt really bored with the prospect of just writing about events and information for potentially the rest of my life. I wanted to be the one planning those events and involved in them! This is usually a common problem for me anyway because I'm a serial over-commiter and in high school I was involved in a lot of things that were worthy of being reported on.

Then joining the LAC (Living Area Council), I realized how great my strengths are in event planning and communicating with people. And then it hit me...what career joins forces with journalism and event planning and working/communicating with people? PUBLIC RELATIONS.

Once I realized what I really wanted, it was an easy switch to completely change life goals, which for me, is a huge deal. So now, I am still a journalism major (as public relations courses are part of the journalism major here at APU) and a marketing minor.

Just today I got to talk to Alexa Hinds, the Community Relations coordinator for the Detroit Red Wings, and just how she described her typical day (her job is essentially to provide volunteer opportunities for the Red Wings players while being able to get their name out), it sounded exactly like something I would love to do. Essentially, I'm pretty darn excited about the change.

So, that's about it. That's my big news of the day! Prayers in this new direction would be awesome too! Let me know what you think about the decision! 

Sunshine Goldenrod, Turtles, and Querencia

Hello all! I'm going to tell a little bit about myself through a social "experiment" that was performed on me last week by Meika (my R.A.). If you are from 5th South - STOP READING! She wants to do this with you all individually as well! So don't ruin the pleasant surprise for yourselves!

Midday Tuesday of last week, Meika and I sat down on Cougar Walk for our regular (every other week) lunch date as LAC (Living Area Council) and RA (Resident Advisor). Typically, in this role we are supposed to talk about hall events and what she wants my role to look like on the hall, but we often get lost in getting to know each other because we are so similar in personality and experiences.

One way she decided to get to know me was by playing a question and answer game with me, a "social experiment," if you will. The game consists of three questions that you have to answer with descriptive words and describing how the thing you answered makes you feel. Then, there is meaning behind the questions and your answers, but you don't find out until after you answer! It will be more clear if you read on...

Do the game with me and find some things out about yourself! 

I would recommend at least three describing words for each question. Here are the questions:

1. What is your favorite color and why? 

My favorite color is yellow - specifically what I like to call Sunshine Goldenrod - because it is bright, sunny and reminds me of being happy. It really reminds me of the sun, most of all, and reminds me of warm weather.

2. What is your favorite animal and why?

My favorite animal is a sea turtle because they are so cute! They remind me of being carefree, just swimming around in the ocean, but they also seem wise because they can grow so old.

3. Where is your favorite (specific or general) place in nature? (i.e. the ocean, mountains, etc.)

There is this one spot on Eleuthera in the Bahamas that I absolutely love. We had to find this spot for Island School and it's called a "querencia," which means where you feel the most connected to Earth, where you can be alone. My spot was in the middle of the Bahamian "jungle," if you will. There were these sink holes made from debris from a decayed golf course that palm trees had grown out of. It was the perfect spot to set up a hammock and just swing and be alone. I like the solitude of it because I like reflection in quiet places. I also love being in nature because it is calming and refreshing. 

What does this all mean?

Ready for some perspective? The adjectives I used to describe my favorite color are words that describe myself - bright, sunny, warm. The adjectives for my favorite animal are what I'm looking for in an ideal partner or future mate - a combination of carefree and wise. The adjectives used to describe your favorite place in nature are used to also describe your relationship with God - one on one, reflection, He's a calming/refreshing presence. 

Comment and tell me what things you said! 

A Day In The Life

Mondays are insane for me, but I am currently in one of my very few moments of down time that I have on Mondays and thought I'd share with you what my day looks like today.

7:40 - My first alarm goes off.

8:30 - I finally roll out of bed after my roommates play me pump up music to get me ready for the day.

9:30 - Chapel on East Campus. We have to go to 3 chapels a week and I have been bad about going to Monday's - hello, it's Monday - but actually managed to pull myself together before it started today. Loved the worship today, it was kind of gospel/soul music that you just wanted to sway to. So uplifting and calming.

10:40 - Today I had a journalism exam worth 15% of my grade. What. Welcome to college, folks. I love this class, and is in the running for my favorite. The professor is this really snarky, sarcastic woman (my absolute favorite kind of humor) and mostly shows us videos from the Daily Show to let us know what journalists are doing wrong.

Some of my favorite people on campus who are also
cheerleaders with me. Melanie, Shelbie and Madi.

LUNCH - This is my weird space part of the day where I get out of class at 11:35 and my next class starts at 1:05. So I eat lunch with my friend Madi, book it over to West campus and then sit and talk with my friend Melanie. Did I mention they're my two best friends here at Azusa??


1:05 - Christianity and the Creative Process class is probably my hardest mentally and spiritually. It's seriously a kick in the butt about how I need to start loving God with my mind and my vocation and with the things I create. It's incredible cool and perfect for an artsy fartsy. Today we talked about "Lord of the Rings." Just Lord of the Rings and how it applies to film.

4:00 - Practice with my favorite people in the world. My team is awesome. Sometimes we do cool things like a giant push-up...You will, I'm sure be hearing more about them.

Group push-up!

Dinner - Kind of a weird space of time for me, but I get food! YUM.

7:30 - Graphics class with the homies. I love this class because it's something I've only dabbled in and so far I'm really loving what I'm learning about and what I'm doing in design. I'm sure I'll be posting things about this as well.

This is my first project that I did for my graphics class. I had to design a graphic around the word "melodic."